how i lost my virginity

i want to prove to you how personal i take this diary.
here is how i lost my virginity.



i was 12 years old and i was dating a boy who was older than me. he was 18... he would come n pick me up from school and we would normally go hang out at his house or be with a bunch of friends and just do stupid things that stupid kids do.

i fell in love with him even tho i knew he didnt love me

i was with him for 8 months and one day when it was just me and him, i made a move and i got up on top of him and told him he could have sex with me if he wanted to. i thought back then that sex was how u made a boy love you, it's something i had to find out the hard way over and over again.

he had sex with me, he kissed at my neck at first and it felt good and he started rubbing on my chest and playing with my nipples, he did it too hard and it really hurt and made them sore

i told him to go slow cuz i never did it before and he just smiled
he told me to take my pants off so i did what he told me to do and he pulled me closer to him while i was still getting my pants off
i remember i almost tripped over and hit my head on the corner of the bed
he laughed at me
he always thought everything was just so funny

he asked me if i had ever sucked a dick before, i told him no even tho it was a lie, i had tried sucking dick a few times before and never found the point in it

he took out his cock and told me to touch it and to rub and play with it

he slapped me and told me to do it better he said i had to turn him on

i knew deep down that it all wasnt right but i didnt care

he pulled me by my hair and made me suck his dick he was rough and my hair was all tangled around his dicka nd my mouth and face
i could barely see and the rush of the moment made my pussy really wet and i liked it at that time

if only i knew i was being used when he came in my mouth and told me to swallow it.
I can never forget the taste of the first time ever swallowing cum, it shot into my mouth so fast and it was warm and salty with a nasty aftertaste that i couldnt get out and it felt like it was just a huge glob of it. he wouldnt let me drip any of it

he fucked me and made me bleed then my friends told me later that the bleeding was from popping my cherry.... i wish i could rewind time and make it special